At Least I Can Friggin’ Count!

Because I’m a bit of an insecure, narcissistic prick, when I actually decide to log in and perhaps post some sort of drivel, the first thing I do is check where my traffic is coming from.  I know, I’m weak.  It’s like a sickness.  But anyways, as I was saying, I saw in my stats that I was getting a bit of traffic from a link that looked like:  hubpages.com/hub/10-examples-of-a-bad-blog.  “Hmm,” I thought.  “Ten examples! This I must see!”,  hoping to see nine other blogs worse than mine.  Plus, I wanted to see what they had to say about me.  Even bad attention is still attention (remember the whole insecure, narcissistic prick thing?).

What did I see when I went to check out the 10 Examples of Bad Blogs?  Only five fucking blogs!  Motherfucker can’t count!  Or, he’s kind of a lazy asshole like me and stopped at five.  Either way, at first I felt duped.  And then kind of honored, because that meant instead of only 1/10th of the post being about me and The Worst SEO Blog Ever!, now it was 1/5th.  And more is always more.

So, zball24, thank you for the attention.  And I hope you get a fan someday.  And thank you for making me feel twice as important as I did when I first clicked that link.

the Ruper Is Wrong and Mark Cuban Is An Idiot

After writing my intelligent and awesomely insightful post about Rupert Murdoch’s misguided plan of having all his content de-indexed from Google (and I assume Bing, Yahoo!, Cuil, etc., etc.), I read what I thought might be an intriguing post from Mark Cuban, who, according to this post title, I think is an idiot.  His post pretty much confirmed my suspicions.  He’s an idiot.

I’m not talking just about his supporting all the “9/11 was an inside job” kooks, though that surely makes him suspect.  I’m not even talking about his inability to apparently use a question mark (there’s no space between the last word in the sentence and the question mark!!!!!!  Geez!).  I’m talking about his premise about how the Ruper (what they call him down at the YMCA) is having all his content pulled from Google’s index.

The problem is, instead of telling us why the Ruper is right, Mark Cuban just talks about how Twitter was a game-changer (hate that word).  And that’s fine – Twitter has changed the game some.  But that story is soooo three months ago.  Cuban doesn’t tell us anything other than Twitter is awesome and Rupert Murdoch is smart.

However, he doesn’t address Murdoch’s going to a paid content model.  If I followed a link on the Twitter to a fucking site where I had to pay money for a fucking subscription to read the damn article, I’d be pissed.  And I imagine the same could be said for other people.  It isn’t going to make NewsCorp any more money.  It’s likely going to piss people off and the only people who’ll shell out the dough to access their news are either other journalists or Fox News true believers.  If I were advertising with Murdoch’s properties, I’d join the other rats fleeing that sinking ship.  And I haven’t read anything saying Murdoch isn’t pursuing a paid content model.  It’s idiotic, and, again, it’s putting ego over profits.  Counting on only the Twitter and Facebook to push your brand is also 1999 thinking.  To support that kind of idiocy makes you an idiot too.  Though, not knowing how to use a question mark and joining the kook squad does too (okay, I’m an asshole and going back on my word of those not making Mark Cuban an idiot).

It’s his ball and he can do with it as he wants, just as Mark Cuban can use his network and name to pursue the whole Bush Administration caused 9/11 angle.  But if you’re gonna’ tell me that Rupert Murdoch is right and I’m an idiot, tell me why, don’t just lay more fucking platitudes on the Twitter.

And don’t call me a netizen.

“is andy dick an asshole?”

Last Sunday, someone asked a question and apparently that query got them to this shithole.  As a result, for some reason I feel compelled to answer their question.  So, here we go:

Question: Is Andy Dick an asshole?

Answer: Yes.

Rupert Murdoch, You Fucking Dinosaur

So, after a half a week and a weekend of no interweb, no the Twitter and nothing else giving me any news, I got onto the Twitter to see Mr. Pilatowski twatting some re-tweet about Rupert Murdoch having all his internets de-indexed by Google.

Say what?!?!?!?!

While most webmasters are bending over backwards licking Matt Cutts in the bad spot and sacrificing goats at the altar of Google to get some traffic, Mr. Murdoch is taking the bold new path of not having his sites indexed and perhaps rank for relevant news stories in Google. As part of his new paid access to News Corp. content, he’s cutting access to Google and other aggregators because they’ve been getting some sort of a free ride on the ol’ Rupert Murdoch express.  So, while the search engines and aggregators have been pimping his friggin’ sites for him for free, he’s decided to call bullshit on them and go to a paid model?  Seriously, that’s a good strategy?

Rupert, it’s time to join the year 2009.  Yes, Google, Bing, Yahoo! and all the search engines, as well as all the news aggregators, have been getting free shit from you.  In return, you get a whole bunch of friggin’ links that build value to your online properties.  As a result, your sites rank for stuff.   All because your websites are considered a fucking resource!!! What’s so hard about that to understand?!?!?!

There are plenty of people your age using the internet and I’m pretty fucking sure they’d understand what the hell I’m saying.  But instead, you’re going to take your ball and go home like a little bitch.  Meanwhile, you might get some people who sign up for the shit on your site, though, they’d likely get it somewhere else for fucking free. And I’m sure your advertisers are going to love the drop in traffic and ROAS they were receiving from the free traffic that went to your site leaches.  In the end, you’re putting pride ahead of profits.  And in the end, I hope it’s worth it.  Maybe you and fucking Mark Cuban can have a pity party when the fucking traffic dries up and News Corp and whatever the hell Cuban runs end up in the dust bin of internet history.

I got to be honest though.  This is so fucking exciting and I CANNOT wait to watch this train wreck!  Off to find corn for popping!  This is gonna’ be hilarious!