Archive for May 21st, 2008

Now Where’s Your God, Tweeple?

May 21, 2008

Roughly 98% of the search marketing industry has drank the Twitter-Aid.  We have our matching black Nikes.  We’ve resorted to calling each other cutesy (but really fucking annoying) little names and writing love letters to Twitter.  We have sang it’s praises and its unlimited potential for our clients and our businesses.  We’ve lavished praise on those companies that have found our bitches and moans on the Twitter as well as those who we think are “doing it right”.  This thing has become just shy of a cult – and I’d call it a cult but I use it and I wouldn’t be a part of a cult that’d have me as a cult member.

We’ve bought into the Twitter and have been actively selling it as “the place to be” for our clients.

Okay, so do we really want to sell ourselves to a fucking platform that’s been up and down for the last five days?  Is it wise to advise our clients to put their marketing monies and energy into something that’s acting this fucking unreliable? Seriously?

At least those fucking Burma Shave signs could be counted on to be on the fence posts at the end of the day.

Bill Gates Lives In Alternate Universe; Has Magic Tablet PC

May 21, 2008

Bill Gates is a crazy motherfucker. Seriously. According to a Vanessa Fox post on the Twitter, apparently Mr. Gates said some crazy-ass shit like “Google image and video searches are OK, but not really innovative compared to Live” (that’s quote’s from Ms. Fox’s Twitter thingy).

Is he fucking crazy?!?!?!?!? Has he ever tried searching fucking!?!?!?!?! Am I using too many question and exclamation marks??!?!?!?!??!?!?!

Seriously though – did he really say that shit with a straight face? Every fucking time I try to use fucking for search I want to kill a motherfucker. Their results are garbage. And I’m no fucking Cuttlett or uber-Google fanboy, but the motherfuckers are doing some shit right. Mr. Gates, you and your buddy Crazy Legs Ballmer should check out what they’re doing down there and take some fucking notes. Or buy a new dictionary so you understand the definition of “innovative”. I mean, you people can’t even figure out how to redirect me to perhaps the correct spelling of a search that I fucked up!!!

It’s shit like this that’s why Microsoft and MSN are going down the shitter. They need to quit huffing their own fumes and just figure out how to not fuck up search. Or Windows. Or Xbox. Or Zune.

In other MSN Sucks News, Ballmer gets egged.